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The Breakup

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Fuck Her Brains Out

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I'm Sober?

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Kick His Ass

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Seeing Double

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Mouthful of Rum

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The White Russian

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The Problem with Beer Goggles

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"If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?"

Dick Roasters Cooking Hot Dogs
October 10th, 2007
The most recent technological breakthrough for BBQing hot dogs. Guarunteed to make your hot dog juicy and well cooked, but the imagery of my roasted dick is a bit disturbing.
The Ass Family New Family on the Block
April 30th, 2007
The newest family to move into the neighborhood doesn't beat around the bush, they admit it -- they are asses. But they're proud of it, they have one of everything!
A very sexy pumpkin Halloween Sex-O-Lantern
October 5th, 2007
This jack-o-lantern inparticular should win best design for 2006, it speaks on so many levels. Well, to be honest, I suppose it only speaks on one level.
Mad Bush? The MAD Magazine Kid
April 30th, 2007
Ever wonder what happened to that weird kid from MAD magazine? Well, as you know nobody can be young forever and everyone grows up... but what might that wacky icon become?
Parking for Drunk Drivers Parking for Drunk Drivers
April 25th, 2007
There's parking for Handicapped people, Loading Zones, Expectant mothers, and now there's prime parking for Drunk Drivers! Yes, if you drink and drive, this space is just for you.
My Ass Hurts My Ass Hurts
April 20th, 2007
So one two chocolate bunnies walk into a bright white area and one says to the other... "My Ass Hurts" ...
Bamboo Mountain Bike Bamboo Mountain Bike
May 11th, 2007
The plan was needlessly complicated. Find the perfect pieces of bamboo for bike tubing and build up a bike surrounding it with a couple thousand dollars in bike components. Heres the result.
Safe Sex Safe Sex
March 27th, 2007
Yup, this one is pretty dirty but teaches a very valuable lesson about using protection and ... well, probably a lot of lube.
Dora the Explorer Dora exploring new exciting places
December 19th, 2006
The must have new toy for christmas 2006! It is the gift that keeps on giving all year round. You will always find it a pleasurable experience with your Dora Aquapent and it will never disappoint. Explore the murky depths and fulfil your every fantasy with dora as your personal playmate. The "Dora the Explorer" toy line has definitely diversified.
PS1 + PS2 = PS3, duh! PS1 + PS2 = PS3 (duh!)
December 15th, 2006
"The ultimate gaming machine. Yes, that's right, the PS3. The two machines are currently fastened together with standard high-performance duct tape. Imagine being able to play Gran Turismo 1 at the same time as you're playing Gran Turismo 4 (two TVs required but not included). None of those other non-custom Playstation 3s out there allow you to play two games at once."
Where ice cream comes from The Ice Cream Industry
November 15th, 2006
If you ever wondered where ice cream comes from, now you know. Enjoy your next cone of creamy snowman poo, I know I will!

» More Funny Stuff


Daily Funny Joke

Featured Joke

Q: How do you know you're too drunk to drive?
A: When you swerve to miss a tree and realize its your air freshener.

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My turn!

Who was that?

Heavenly ride

Got gas?

Jock's eh!

Sheer delight?

On the pill

Beer nuts blow

Porn broadcast stuns news viewers
(AP) -- Sweden's state broadcaster SVT on Monday faced ridicule for mistakenly showing a porn movie in the background of a news broadcast over the weekend.
New Rubiks Cube world record set
SAN FRANCISCO, California (AP) -- A 20-year-old California Institute of Technology student set a new world record for solving the popular Rubik's Cube puzzle, turning the tiled brain-twister from scrambled to solved in 11.13 seconds.
Grandma, let me play that video game!
SHALERSVILLE, Ohio (AP) -- A 69-year-old grandmother has become the heroine of young video-game fans and the star of a Web log created by her grandson.
Teacher loses weight on 'Super Size Me' diet
EDMONTON - After a month of eating only McDonald's food, a teacher in Edmonton has lost weight, lowered his blood pressure and won a bet with his biology students, but nutritionists say he's risking his health.
Australian MPs debate TV nudity
CANBERRA, Australia (Reuters) -- The nude antics of reality television contestants on the Big Brother program have prompted Australian government politicians to demand a review of how much nudity can be shown on free television down under.
Raptors cheerleader with porn site fired
A 19-year-old dancer who appears in various states of undress on her Web site says she was fired from her job as a Toronto Raptors cheerleader because the basketball team considered the photos inappropriate.
Winning lottery ticket purchased with stolen credit card
MEDFORD, Oregon (AP) -- A woman bought a winning lottery ticket worth $1 million with a stolen credit card and could wind up with nothing if convicted, police said.
Airliner fakes emergency so passengers can watch soccer game
LIMA, Peru (AP) -- A chartered jet carrying 289 Gambian soccer fans pretended it needed to make an emergency landing so they could watch their team compete in the FIFA Under 17 World Championships, officials said Wednesday.
Man sues ex-girlfriend over glued genitals
GREENSBURG, Pennsylvania (AP) -- A Pennsylvanian man sued his ex-girlfriend for more than $30,000 for gluing his genitals to his abdomen five years ago.
Mechanic sucked into jet engine
(CNN) -- A mechanic standing near a Boeing 737 at El Paso International Airport in Texas was sucked into one of the engines and killed Monday, officials said.
Doc's diagnosis: Nail gun caused headache
PORTLAND, Oregon (AP) -- An Oregon man who went to a hospital complaining of a headache was found to have 12 nails embedded in his skull from a suicide attempt with a nail gun, doctors say.
PlayStation maker Sony granted patent for beaming sensory information into brain
LONDON, England (Reuters) -- If you think video games are engrossing now, just wait: PlayStation maker Sony Corp. has been granted a patent for beaming sensory information directly into the brain.
Mouthy parrot reveals sex secret
LONDON, England -- A computer programmer found out his girlfriend was having an affair when his pet parrot kept repeating her lover's name, British media reported Tuesday.
Teen's camcorder records his death
LA CROSSE, Wisconsin (AP) -- Seth Hammes was filming in the woods when his camcorder recorded the crack of gunshots, the 17-year-old's screams and the voice of the alleged shooter, promising help that never came.
81yo woman at car dealership hits husband, salesman, car, tree and wall
FORT MYERS, Florida (AP) -- An 81-year-old woman preparing to take a test drive at a car dealership hit her husband, a salesman, a car and a tree before running into a wall.
Norway woman convicted for rape
OSLO, Norway (Reuters) -- A Norwegian court has sentenced a woman to nine months in jail for raping a man, the first such conviction in the Scandinavian country that prides itself for its egalitarianism.
Man injured in sex shop attack
STOCKHOLM, Sweden (AP) -- An explosive device detonated in a sex shop in southwestern Sweden early Monday and one man was slightly injured, police said.
Lightsaber duel: two critical
LONDON, England -- Two Star Wars fans are in critical condition after apparently trying to make "lightsabers" by filling fluorescent light tubes with petrol, British media reports say.
Woman sold daughter for car, Second daughter allegedly forced into prostitution
OKEECHOBEE, Florida (AP) -- A woman was arrested for allegedly forcing her 12-year-old daughter into prostitution and trading a 14-year-old daughter for a car.
Dominatrix hid client death
ADDAMS, Massachusetts (AP) -- A prosecutor said Tuesday that a dominatrix dismembered and disposed of the body of a client who died of a heart attack during a bondage session in her makeshift dungeon.
Girls sued for $900 for delivering cookies
Two teenage girls who surprised their neighbors with homemade cookies late one night were ordered to pay nearly $900 in medical bills for a woman who says she was so startled that she had to go to the hospital.


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